The Algorithmic Dogshit of Skate's Soundtrack
The new skate. game has been a fun romp insofar as you accept what it is; a bonafide nostalgia capture that’s a vehicle for microtransactions and insidious audience retention through online-only gameplay and lack of a coherent story mode. Gone are the real-life skaters who gave a sense of lived-in worldbuilding, a fully-fledged campaign and any semblance of authenticity toward the culture—we’ve now received Fortnite-esque character models to thinly customize, an early access model using players as testers to drip feed them content, and the removal of modes long thought to be standard, an unfortunate feature of the new gaming landscape that treats its consumers as pitiful lemmings lapping up anything they put out with no resistance.
But I’m not here to do a full review of all the failings of skate. That’s been done by the countless outraged voices under the Steam review page, the Youtube talking heads, the exasperation at how Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 3+4 was similarly botched. No, my biggest problem with this game is that the soundtrack is abysmal horseshit.
Skating games have long had their soundtracks held as big reasons why they’re so beloved. THPS is the king of this phenomenon—see Goldfinger’s Superman, Primus’ Jerry Was A Racecar Driver, Anthrax and Public Enemy’s Bring the Noise all being paragons of 90s gaming nostalgia and gateways into subgenres of rock and rap. As the tides of gaming shifted away from the skate game wave, that specific brand of macho nu-metal, backpacker hip-hop, and hardcore punk that saturated those games’ soundtracks still were prevalent in the skate. franchise, with many of the same bands and their contemporaries. It’s not entirely heretical to go away from this strand of soundtrack, however, the 2025 entry in the series has so completely and thoroughly botched what could’ve been a cool stylistic reinvention by adding some of the worst music I’ve ever heard.
Back when I reviewed the new Turnstile, I panned them by saying it’s music for Urban Outfitters, and what do you know, they make an appearance here! 1 of only 2 hardcore songs, the other conspicuously being their Taco Bell commercial comrades, Scowl. Focus-tested punk is the name of the game, with tepid tracks like ALEXSUCKS’ Whatever I Want and Upchuck’s Facecard providing an in-game atmosphere that is less skate video and more PR agency promotional reel. There is embarrassingly little bite to many of these “punk” songs, that they might as well be AI-generated. I’m not sure whether that’s better or worse.
And the lack of bite continues with the amount of indie darlings on display. I love Panda Bear and like mk.gee and Horsegirl, but what the hell are they doing in a skating game? Their artistic merits are ill-suited to slamming from giant heights and doing Looney Tunes shit, sticking out like a sore thumb. The same goes for Car Seat Headrest, Soccer Mommy, Magdalena Bay, and King Krule. These are bizarre choices, making it seem like the music supervisor thumbed through Pitchfork and Stereogum and called it a day. But even they have more musical diversity than this.
It just gets worse and worse when you look at the selections of rap. Quinn XCII’s Hold My Hand, Worry Less, REDD’s JEANS SO BAGGY, and BWise’s THREE65 are easily some of the most putrid songs I’ve ever had the displeasure to encounter, artists that sound like they were created in a lab at Zumiez. It gets to the point where extremely washed Denzel Curry and Ski Mask the Slump God is a breath of fresh air. One of the better rap tracks is Joey Valance & Brae’s No Hands, which is saying something considering it’s just a warmed-over Beastie Boys retread, but it doesn’t at least actively insult anyone who likes the genre. To think, this series once featured Rick Ross, Young Jeezy, dead prez and Gang Starr.
The most egregious failing of this soundtrack, though, has to be the amount of stock music used. Prevalent in the open world are collectible songs you can add that aren’t immediately available in your playlists, which would be a cool feature, except most of it is literally production music that EA paid for to use. It’s honestly a stunning cost-cutting measure, one that Liz Pelly would laugh at for being too on the nose for these companies. Corporate executives not only try to sell you unfinished games, but faceless algorithmic slop, and expect you to eat it up.
I thought the Tony Hawk remake soundtracks were bad, but skate.’s audacity and shamelessness truly takes the cake. Not only content with having the music be overwhelmingly bland, but their conceit that extra anonymous tracks adds consumer value is wildly insulting. I’m sure that’s how they justified the game being free to play—people will eat it up regardless. Just, for your sake, mute the radio and put on some Dead Kennedys.
BONUS:
5 songs that can stay:
ESG - My Love for You
Giorgio Moroder - Chase
HiTech ft. Juan Michael OG - GASOLINE
Sunny Day Real Estate - In Circles
The Meters - Cissy Strut
And 20 songs that should be added:
Playboi Carti - EVILJ0RDAN (they fumbled so bad not asking him)
Mastodon - Island (RIP Brett Hinds)
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